Our trip to Mexico was a load of fun. It can be summed up with two basic conversations that Pnut and I had in variations over the course of five days.
Conversation n°1: The Travel Snobs
topo: Gawr, more drunk obnoxious Americans. How hard is it to treat people with respect in their own country? I am so ashamed.
Pnut: I think the crazy one is actually Canadian.
topo: Canadians are just Americans without guns.
Pnut: You have to admit, they’re more fun than British on holiday.
topo: Americans are just loud Brits without tea. We are never doing an all-inclusive again.
Pnut: Have you seen my flippy-floppies, muthafucka?*
[*note: this is the consequence of introducing an Italian to Lonely Island]
Conversation n°2: Pacific Topo
topo: (underwater screaming, sounds of swallowing water, thrashing noises to the surface) OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! Did you SEE THAT FISH? It was right by my face! RIGHT BY MY FACE!
Pnut: topo, settle down. It’s not interested in you.
topo: But it could TOTALLY have BITTEN ME!
Pnut: It doesn’t have teeth.
topo: Well, I don’t want it rubbing its fishy gums all over me either. And I swallowed half the Pacific!
Pnut: Put your mask back on, I’ll hold your hand.
topo: Like that’s going to keep the sharks away.
–(five minutes later)–
topo: (muffled by snorkel mask) BARRACUDAAAAA!!!! BARRACUDAAAAA!!
Pnut: Nobody can hear you screaming underwater, you know.
topo: (mask removed) AND I GOT STUNG BY A JELLYFISH! Oh my god! It hurts! It hurts! OW! I just got stung by another! OW! AND ANOTHER! OW!…
Pnut: Are you SURE you were a swimmer?
topo: WE PRACTICED IN A POOL!
Yup, that was us in Mexico. Pnut did convince me to try scuba in the end, and I loved it.
April 29th, 2010 at
topo, you didn’t swallow half of the Pacific but three quarters of the Caribbean See.
Other side of the Americas.
May 4th, 2010 at
Canadians have more guns than Americans. They drink more too.
June 7th, 2010 at
Well at least there was not a 3rd conversation … hurry up in the bathroom, I can’t hold it!! ; ))
I love the first monologue! F hilarious!