topotales

Nobody does Indian or Canadian comedy as well as Russel Peters!

Here’s what he thinks about the Italian language…

oh, … and, sooner or later, we’re gonna hump ya!

So now somebody tell me what Indian + American + Italian kids would be called?

I know, I know… again, MIA for too long. But I have good reasons.  The nervous breakdown (number two), already anticipated, finally arrived in all its glory and tears.  This time, Efexor and a multitude of other equally scary drugs arrived as well.  People tell me they are good for me, but I have to say that I’ve had better bad trips than these drugs.  No fun at all, people.  And I remember a couple of times in the good old days when I actually ganked antidepressants off of friends while out drinking, just to have a good time.

So now I have to tell you one of the best things about living in Belgium.  I can go to a doctor, get all weirded out on anti-depressants, and he hands me a note that says I don’t have to go to work.  And then he hands me another note.  And another.  And hopefully, two weeks from now, he will hand me yet another.  Because this is some seriously nutty shit, these drugs.  Sometimes I have good days, and I think - yes, this is over, I can go back to living my life.  But about twenty minutes after the Efexor kicks in, and I’m crying hysterically into Paolo’s shoulder, unable to process any thought except - cry, cry, cry… I realize that no, I’m not ready to go back to anything.  Not work, not home, not reading, not me.  Then I take the tranquilizer that “evens it out”.  I find that I’m taking drug after drug, trying to balance myself out.  Is this how it’s supposed to work?  Is this how I’m supposed to be living?  Who lives like this, cutting a human form of water and molecule by using drug after drug, trying to make something resembling a normal person?  Is the psychiatrist an artist, giving me the tools to reshape my psyche?  Why isn’t the lump of molecules good enough on it’s own?  Take anything, give it the appropriate context, and it is art.  So was I art before this, simply out of context?  Or am I art now, mangled and woven by the context of norms that I don’t understand?

In the interim, Paolo and I went to Venice.  Previous plans to fix his car and see his family, plus give me a taste of Carnavale.  I’ll have to catch up on that trip another time.

In the interim, let me get back to something I should have done weeks ago!

…….

These excellent questions were asked by Kerri of The Blonde Merryweather:

1. What is the best vacation you’ve ever been on?  Was it great
because of the place you went, the people you went with, or the stuff
you did while you were there?

I took my favorite “vacation” when I was 20.  After a summer of classes in Madrid, I hitch-hiked from Alicante, Spain to Málaga, Spain with my best friend, El.  It was two weeks on one of the most beautiful coastlines in the world with nothing but a backpack and a bit of luck.  We cajoled fresh, salty sardines off of fishermen for free.  We smoked hash and drank wine on hidden beaches with generous strangers.  We ate the best squid I have ever tasted with white wine.  We were robbed and chased the thief across a beach.  We carried an enormous drum that I insisted I would learn how to play along the way.  We fought, we laughed, we made friends, we got brown, and finally we fell madly in love.  There are enough stories from each day of that vacation to fill my entire lifetime.  And indeed, almost every day I am reminded of some incredible moment we shared.

2. Have you ever had something that you were convinced you were never
going to be able to do, and then you managed it?  Be it mastering some
skill or keeping up motivation for some resolution.  How did you keep
up your motivation while you were working towards the goal?

It was a six-year goal to move back to Europe.  After living in Spain illegally for a couple of years running a small bed and breakfast I needed a change.  I figured I could move to the US, get an international job, and be back in Spain within a year or two.  I may, possibly, have underestimated the power of a degree in English Literature.  So I went from international company to international company in St. Louis (located in Misery, the armpit of the USA), pressuring as many people as I could, picking up as many languages as I could.  I took night classes and worked my way towards a degree in International Relations.  Finally, I got a break for a job in Belgium.  It took very little convincing to get me 1500 miles closer to Spain.  But the goal is still there - a place in the sun with friendly people, great calamari, good wine, ocean, mountains and… someplace I can write without needing a corporate day-job.  I don’t need to try and keep my motivation - it’s always there, waiting… that image of myself in a cottage by the sea surrounded by a rainbowed family, an enormous library of books, dogs, and a couple of horses in the stable.

3. If you found yourself with $1,000 that you had to spend in the next
24 hours, what would you buy?

I’ve been dreaming about having one of these tarp tents for a while.  So, that’s be first on the list.  Then, probably, a decent mountainbike (I’m totally not even qualified to know what that means) so I can think about trying a Triathlon sometime this summer.

4. If you could get back in touch with anyone from your past that
you’ve lost touch with, who would it be?  Why did you lose touch with
them to begin with?

Actually, I’m in touch with pretty much everybody I’d like to be in touch with from the past.  The El I mentioned in question number one is currently in Malawi, Africa.  We’ve stayed close despite spending very little time on the same continent and a number of potentially lethal mistakes both on her part and mine in our relationship (both when we were together, and later as friends).  But a great deal of tension has built up around that relationship over the years.  It’s a great regret of mine.  I always thought she was the great love of my life, and I messed that up.  But there’s no reason that a great love can’t continue on in different ways.  Or am I mistaken on that?  I’d love to hear what others think about that one.

5. What website do you visit most often?  Is there a guilty pleasure
website that you visit that you’d be somewhat embarrassed to admit you
enjoy?

Oh dear.  I am a total blog addict.  Currently, my favorite blog is written by schmutzie.  I suppose because she feels like a close  compatriot in the battle against crazy.  As I’ve mentioned before, I also love sweet-juniper.  I guess my guilty pleasure website would be sweet and salty, but not because I’m embarassed to read it.  Just because I’ve never lost a child… I’ve rarely even wanted to have one!  So I feel a bit like a sneaky, unwanted interloper when I’m over there.  But something in her writing touches me very deeply.  And that’s the mark of a great writer, isn’t it - somebody who can touch your soul and make you understand something completely foreign to you!